Before you say anything like, "What? I think it's funny and really smart!" I want you to read the rest of this page and check out the website.

Yes, that is an ad for Sprite. Sprite, you say? Yes, Sprite. The lemon-lime soda that opens the doors at Coca-Cola's parties? But how? I have no clue.

The above sign is on the subway trains here in Stockholm and I can assure you that my attention was "grabbed" when I first saw it. What, I thought to myself, is that all about? I wondered this because of the following:

There was no product mentioned - well done Sprite. I would not have bothered to think twice if I knew the ad was for a soda.

The web address was in English - but ended with the Swedish country code of .se. Just about anything can happen when they do that.

Being that this type of thing was pretty much the reason I got an iPhone (that and taking pictures of this type of thing) I hurried to the sellyourmother.se website. What could it be? I'd been reeled in and I needed to know. What happened next can be taken two ways. If you believe in Steve Jobs you would say, "What a bunch of morons." If you don't, you would say, "Stupid Steve Jobs." You see, the website is entirely built in Flash and not viewable on the iPhone. (To be honest here, I'm pretty sure most cellphones would not be able to view the website. Which makes one wonder just how smart it was for Sprite to advertise heavily on a subway where people would be using a cellphone to view the site. Ahhh doiiii.) Anyways, I had to wait till I got home to see just what the hell was up with this site. At this time I was still unaware that Sprite was behind it.

10 minutes later

Home. To computer. Type in domain. Site comes up. What the F. It's best if you just hit up the link above, that would save me having to explain it. BUT, here's the deal. You can umm...win prizes by uploading a picture of your mother - if your mother gets the most votes you win a new MacBook (ironic) and your mother wins a spa holiday (why don't they get a MacBook?). By participating you also receive a cellphone voucher for a free Sprite (more irony). Weekly prizes are less exciting. Mom wins a $30 gift certificate and you win some ugly ass Reeboks - seriously they have Iron Maiden stuff on them.

I don't actually know where the selling comes in. The site is really confusing and it has way too much going on. But, you can get free Sprite so I guess it's not all bad. Hopefully my mom doesn't mind me entering her so that I can win that MacBook. I think the picture of her giving money to a guy dressed up like Darth Vader is a sure winner.

Oh, apparently "Sprite is so good you'd sell your mother for it."

UPDATE - I have added the awesome image to the right of my mom for sale to the site. Now to just await the winnings...
VOTE FOR MY MOM HERE

Permalink    Labels: Stockholm, Wackiness, Food

There is a very peculiar issue in Sweden when it comes to spelling. I imagine something similar to it exists in other Germanic language speaking countries. Here I like to call it the compound word problem.

As with most Germanic languages Swedish uses the compound word structure when creating nouns. That means that you call a meatball a "meatball" and not a "meat ball". But you also call a chicken meatball a "chickenmeatball". The Swedish term for this problem: särskrivningsproblematik, split compound problematics, is an excellent example.

The problem is when you create separate words rather than compound ones. This poses an even greater problem as it often completely changes the intended meaning. For example "chickenliver", if written "chicken liver" in Swedish, means "the chicken lives". This is dangerous if you are referring to say frozen chicken livers. (That example is probably the oldest most worn out joke in Swedish history. The mere mention of chicken livers will more than likely provoke someone to go through the whole song and dance.) The vast amount of English present in this country has caused this type of issue to become and more common. If you want to identify with this problem as an English speaker compare "blue berries" to "blueberries" and "ham burger" to "hamburger".

On the other side of the coin, in Swedish, you also have the problem of creating compound words when the words should be separated. As the sign above on a well known English (style) pub in Stockholm shows. It is completely accurate, in Swedish, as a food lover is known as a matälskare (one word) and a öljägare (one word) is the direct translation of a beer hunter. It looks very wrong in English and is very ironic considering the bar styles itself to be an English pub and even goes so far as to have their signs in English in a non-English speaking country - and then makes a rather severe grammar mistake. This of course is a rather harmless example and most people can easily decipher the meaning of the sign. A bigger problem would be if you were taking a class that was held six times in the evening. Say a French class, because you wanted to learn the language of love and Gérard Depardieu. Then you would be speaking French on these six evenings. (You can see where this is going.) You would, however, not want to write that you were speaking French on "sexkvällar", because that is probably what Gérard Depardieu, and whoever he is together with, are doing. And you are most certainly not.

So, when to put words together and when to keep them apart. Are they together in English or are they separate? If they are separate in English should they be separate in Swedish...and vice versa or viceversa or is it vice-versa. You can see why it's a problem. For every one.

Permalink    Labels: Food, Stockholm, Wackiness

Blatant strange English a la Engrish.com can be some pretty amusing stuff. However, when it comes to Europe and strange examples of English the above is a pretty good one. There is actually a logical, read illogical, reason for it.

The huge banner pictured above can be found at Arlanda Airport (Stockholm's main international airport) and hangs above the SAS check-in counters. Pictured are famous Swedes who, supposedly, make Stockholm their home. While the first part of the message, "We hope you have enjoyed our hometown.", is fine and dandy (albeit a bit like asking if someone enjoyed their dinner at a restaurant), the second part is where the problem is. You are, in effect, being goodbyed and then helloed in the same statement.

This mistake is actually fairly common in Sweden, although it is kind of amazing to see it at the international airport on permanent display. Small shop owners in the more touristy parts of town can get away with a small hand written sign on the inside of their shop doors, but this, this is kind of embarrassing. But, as I said, it does deserve some clarification.

In the Swedish language there is a two word phrase, välkommen åter, which translates as the equivalent of "We hope to see you again" or simply "Please come again". However, it directly translates to "welcome back". If it weren't for the fact that the literal translation becomes the complete opposite of the intended meaning things would probably be ok. Case in point, when this is found upon leaving a shop you are essentially being welcomed back to the real world outside and not to the shop itself...in the future.

This is the part of the show where someone who is Swedish gets really upset and says something like, "Hey, Stockgnome, your Swedish isn't perfect either and you say some really stupid things occasionally because you directly translate from English. Maybe you should shut up." That's fine, maybe I should. But, the point is: I don't make huge signs for international airports in Swedish. Then again, what if I did? What if that was my job. I know what I would do before I placed an order for a really expensive gigantic sign that would be seen by thousands of people everyday - I would have someone who had Swedish as their first language read it first and tell me if it made sense.

Permalink    Labels: Stockholm, Wackiness, Confusion

Permalink    Labels: Confusion, Stockholm, Wackiness, Food